Prologue
Everyone seeks to place his or her life within the context of a greater story. This can be religion, family or friends, work or a pursuit of a goal. In other words, we need meaning in our life. And how have I framed my last two decades?
Unfortunately I can't say much for the first, but my memory is much clearer for the last ten or so years.
I was raised in a Christian home. I say "Christian home" because this was how our life was framed - with church at Sunday being the "end" (or beginning) of the week. From young I hated Sunday school (you either enjoyed it or hated it) and when older found "youth" gatherings uncomfortable (rare was the occasion where I was ever comfortable among my peers). The worship I never enjoyed (always preferred hymns) and the sermons were immensely boring. I would very much life to blame my lack of appreciation of the latter on myself, but eventually I have come to suspect that the individual in the pulpit had something to do with it as well.
All in all, I was not a very good churchgoing Christian. And yet, why have I chosen to call myself a Christian?
First, a little about the label "Christian". Often, when I am consequently asked, "What kind of Christian?" and I have found the additional labels required unhelpful. Protestant, I believe, is woefully archaic. Charismatic - as the churches I have been going to would have been called - could hardly apply to me (my personality is hardly that interesting nor inspiring). Evangelical may be suitable except that nobody understands it anymore. And don't get me started with the "post-" prefix that seems to be getting stuck onto anything nowadays.
So then, a Christian I am. But the perceptive reader would notice another word stuck in front of Christian in the title. So let me explain that.
The quiet life
Like all introverts, I am drained when I am around others and energized when I am alone (actually a rather crude and simplistic description, but close enough). This is not to say my family and friends don't mean a lot. They mean as much. But solitude is something I very much enjoy as well.
But what is more important is what I do with my time. Have I been productive, useful? I certainly hope so. At least the plans and goals (and for this I am very grateful for the opportunities others have given me) to which I have been able to accomplish.
My job, thankfully, allows me a lot of free time. I have become engrossed (once again) with historical study; reading fiction is now a necessary chore (!). I wish to start writing again, so many stories still in my head. Outlines of some are on paper, still waiting to become pixels on the computer screen.
So then...
A Contemplative Christian
Simply put, my goal is to become thoughtful (which is part of humility - to think before acting, the opposite of which is rashness and pride). Not just as a human being but specifically as a Christian.
How should one be thoughtful?
My listening and not just responding immediately (kneejerk responses usually not the best!). Returning to Scriptures for the Truth. To consider the opinions and arguments of other people. Pray.
My belief is not just a result of a conversion experience (actually I remember none) but also a dialogue with others, believers and non-believers. I have participated in extensive conversations - some extremely edifying, others unhelpfully repetitive. I have spent hundreds of hours in related literature, building upon the thoughts and experience of others. I have learnt immensely.
So What?
Well, I have spent a lot of time talking about myself. Hopefully this gives you some insight to the writer. But I write this not only to share, but to provide a coherent outline of my thoughts.
I have grown and learned a lot. My beliefs and attitudes have changed so many times (and, I hope will continue to do so for the better).
The fact is, I have seen too many people take the end of youth to mean the end of all growth (both literally and symbolically). It does not and cannot mean so. If there's one thing my non-institutional education (wink wink) thought me is that learning is a never ending process. Applying this to every aspect of our life is important and, as a Christian, is crucial.
Let this be my own pledge to continue the race.
S.D.G.
Everyone seeks to place his or her life within the context of a greater story. This can be religion, family or friends, work or a pursuit of a goal. In other words, we need meaning in our life. And how have I framed my last two decades?
Unfortunately I can't say much for the first, but my memory is much clearer for the last ten or so years.
I was raised in a Christian home. I say "Christian home" because this was how our life was framed - with church at Sunday being the "end" (or beginning) of the week. From young I hated Sunday school (you either enjoyed it or hated it) and when older found "youth" gatherings uncomfortable (rare was the occasion where I was ever comfortable among my peers). The worship I never enjoyed (always preferred hymns) and the sermons were immensely boring. I would very much life to blame my lack of appreciation of the latter on myself, but eventually I have come to suspect that the individual in the pulpit had something to do with it as well.
All in all, I was not a very good churchgoing Christian. And yet, why have I chosen to call myself a Christian?
First, a little about the label "Christian". Often, when I am consequently asked, "What kind of Christian?" and I have found the additional labels required unhelpful. Protestant, I believe, is woefully archaic. Charismatic - as the churches I have been going to would have been called - could hardly apply to me (my personality is hardly that interesting nor inspiring). Evangelical may be suitable except that nobody understands it anymore. And don't get me started with the "post-" prefix that seems to be getting stuck onto anything nowadays.
So then, a Christian I am. But the perceptive reader would notice another word stuck in front of Christian in the title. So let me explain that.
The quiet life
Like all introverts, I am drained when I am around others and energized when I am alone (actually a rather crude and simplistic description, but close enough). This is not to say my family and friends don't mean a lot. They mean as much. But solitude is something I very much enjoy as well.
But what is more important is what I do with my time. Have I been productive, useful? I certainly hope so. At least the plans and goals (and for this I am very grateful for the opportunities others have given me) to which I have been able to accomplish.
My job, thankfully, allows me a lot of free time. I have become engrossed (once again) with historical study; reading fiction is now a necessary chore (!). I wish to start writing again, so many stories still in my head. Outlines of some are on paper, still waiting to become pixels on the computer screen.
So then...
A Contemplative Christian
Simply put, my goal is to become thoughtful (which is part of humility - to think before acting, the opposite of which is rashness and pride). Not just as a human being but specifically as a Christian.
How should one be thoughtful?
My listening and not just responding immediately (kneejerk responses usually not the best!). Returning to Scriptures for the Truth. To consider the opinions and arguments of other people. Pray.
My belief is not just a result of a conversion experience (actually I remember none) but also a dialogue with others, believers and non-believers. I have participated in extensive conversations - some extremely edifying, others unhelpfully repetitive. I have spent hundreds of hours in related literature, building upon the thoughts and experience of others. I have learnt immensely.
So What?
Well, I have spent a lot of time talking about myself. Hopefully this gives you some insight to the writer. But I write this not only to share, but to provide a coherent outline of my thoughts.
I have grown and learned a lot. My beliefs and attitudes have changed so many times (and, I hope will continue to do so for the better).
The fact is, I have seen too many people take the end of youth to mean the end of all growth (both literally and symbolically). It does not and cannot mean so. If there's one thing my non-institutional education (wink wink) thought me is that learning is a never ending process. Applying this to every aspect of our life is important and, as a Christian, is crucial.
Let this be my own pledge to continue the race.
S.D.G.
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