And Then...

I feel bad, not writing here. I very much would like to share my thoughts. So after three months, I guess you could say I'm back.

I've got a lot of stuff I could just copy and paste here, as "filler". And maybe I'll do that. But for now, here is what's coming up:-

1. After nearly a year at an IT firm, I can proudly say that i. I have one year of real working experience ii. More than enough stories/experiences to write something worthwhile, fiction or non-fiction (or maybe both) iii. A fair bit of money saved up.

2. A bunch of essays on movies, books and other stuff I've been consuming the past year or so. There's a lot that I've yet to write down and I suppose here's where I should commit my thoughts.

Other things - After three years of "college" I realize that a degree is something not to take lightly; that you should never try to do it just for the sake of doing it. I tell that to everyone who says they're just studying for the sake of studying. Don't. And for those who are doing business because they have no idea what else to do. DON'T.

I want to travel. Haven't in a long while. Right now I'm caught between two choices (both of which are within my budget). One month in a few nice European countries or overland journey across Asia. Hmm...

Old Year/New Year

This year passed exceptionally quickly. It could be many things, probably how my life has settled into routine, probably because the days have literally begun to become shorter (actually, it is likely because the older you get the faster your perception of time becomes).

I remembered I made some resolutions about one year ago today. Well, I can't remember them now except one, which was to read 100 books for this year. So naturally, I haven't fulfilled it but I did get pretty darn close (97% hah!). I could have cheated with some quick reads, but decided to plod it through some challenging and fascinating tomes (I'm currently a little ways through The Thousand Autumns of Jacob de Zoet, one of the most enjoyable works I've had the pleasure to read).

Work has taken a whole lot of time from my other pursuits, but I've begun to manage. Spend less time on the PC, I've found, and you have a lot of time for other things. I don't mind this, considering that the PC is my job and by the time I get back I'm sick of it.

One thing I would like to work on for the next year - more writing (or writing more?). My efforts at stories longer than a few thousand words have never taken off and I recall now a writer's all too true observation that novels are a voracious eater of ideas - you run out of them very quickly.

Another curious thing is how I find movies less and less entertaining. Or maybe I've spoiled myself on too much classics and coupled with the lower quality of movies released this year. I have a dozen or so "critically acclaimed" movies sitting in my hard disk that I've yet to watch, so we'll see.

And yes, my project idea still remains fresh in my mind. I conceived it back in 2008 and once I collect enough funds, will get it started in early 2012. So next year will be just sitting back in my already comfortable job, getting the monthly paychecks and dreaming of a better life. Ah, if only.

Closing Date

There are two of the most obvious things that young people seem to forget. One, that we will die and two, that we will grow old.

"When you grow older, your expectations and ambitions become less and less" I have heard many people say. Some even add "until you are happy with what you are at the moment". Now I'm quite sure that the first half is true although if the second half was also true, self-help books wouldn't be doing so well.

Working offers a chance for comparison and benchmarks with other people. I probably am the youngest person in the office and as such note that down whenever I see someone ten years older than me earning the same amount of money I do. That is a somewhat sad thought, not just for that person (because we don't get paid a lot, not for what we do) but also for me. Will I be like that as well, ten years from now?

The older you grow the faster time passes, I notice. Is it because we have more to occupy ourself with? It's true I find my days remarkably short and unfortunately quite routine. Even during the happier times when there was only me and books it was, uh, just me and books all the time.

So then I occupy myself with plans and projects to (occupy myself?) perhaps break from my staid existence. But I realize also that someone as remarkably blessed as me (I say this with gratefulness) should also pause and think before demanding more for myself. I already have so much.

But times will change. I will be called upon to "support" my family (unless I leave this life and become but a wonderer, what a nice thought). I maybe just maybe, end up working in a cubicle until I retire (sneer at this thought as much as you will, but the families who are being supported by those same people won't be so snobbish).

I realize I no longer am a child and I'm glad. I think retirement, the so called period of endless rest after a long period of toil is a bad idea. There is rest and there is work and for both I believe there will be no end.

What's next after this? Well, work - but I'm saving money for an idea. Here's to hoping it works. =)

P.S. Merry Christmas, Happy New Year.

Copying Text

"To steal a book is an elegant offense" so goes an old Chinese saying. Is there any difference therefore, between downloading an MP3 of Lady Gaga and procuring a digital copy of an Economics textbook (16th edition, revised monthly)?

Well, I leave the ethical/moral discussions of such scenarios to those who have time (and of course, the money) but for me I began thinking about it a little further when I was browsing through Kakutani's top 10 books of 2010 and downloaded almost all the books listed within minutes. Such a thing is most interesting for e-books because only a few years ago (by that I mean pre-Kindle days, or the year 2006) such a feat would be impossible. E-book proliferation (and by extension, piracy) has indeed come a long way.

To be frank, I've downloaded my fair share of books (and movies and music, but mostly books). I realized such a collection would have cost an enormous amount of money had I legally purchased all of them (then again, I would not have purchased them in the first place). One thing's for sure - I got one heck of an education that most people who chose to go a "legal" route would've only dreamed about.*

Now here's another good question for the armchair ethicists (aren't we all!) out there - should such education be withheld from the common folk simply because of financial (and copyright and whatever) considerations? On one hand, I think content creators should be paid for their efforts. On another, the educational benefits of unleashing all that text and making them available to the masses for little to no cost may almost certainly outweigh all other considerations. Here's one to think about.

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* But of course, if you have a great library in your town (and could borrow most of their books there), then you could also have a similar education for free.**

**This does not apply if you live in Malaysia.

23/11/2010

Five years later, my college education draws to a close. I have learnt many things and as it so happens most of those things aren't remotely related to my degree. I now know that it is better to wait than pick a course for the sake of picking one. I was told when we began that this was for those who were unsure.

I was unsure, initially. A few years in however, I began to be quite sure. But it was too late. Do I regret? Well, not really. I've probably spent more time studying other things that what I was supposed to study in my course. I grown rather cynical of institutionalized education and at the same time still wish to study in a decent university.

Well, being trained in business, I still have no business plans of my own. I only have what I call "projects" - highly expensive with an unknown return on investment. But it would still be fun to try.